I have to work tonight. =)) Another eve away from home. ...try again or walk away...

所有的一切，都有风淡云清的一天，总有一天，
你看到他就像看到一张桌子那么简单

...try again or walk away...

逆转时光到一开始 能不能给一秒
等着哪一天你也想起
那悬在记忆中的美好

...try again or walk away...

It’s the little things that you do for each other, the simple things that take a little effort and are greatly appreciated. =))
...try again or walk away...

Happy Birthday LEE ZILIN~!!!
I want to go shopping~~
...try again or walk away...

Raining is destroying the smile I wanted to carry.
Wad can I do? I hate this December. =((
If I think it another way, I can make it better with a second chance.
A second chance I didnt asked for. =))
Come to think its not the first time bad things happened.
The sun will shine one day~

I am waiting for my waffle. =))
I am waiting for my free holiday trip. =))
I am waiting for my next paycheck. =))
I am waiting for the wishes. =))
I am waiting for a new start =))

I am waiting for that rainbow. =))
...try again or walk away...

It's her hard-earned money and I threw them into the sea.
Write me a cash cheque with $6000. I wont return to you.
I will remember you for life.
=((
...try again or walk away...

=(( I am so tired. I dont want to work~~ I miss my secondary school days so much~
I see you online everyday BUT why you dont want to talk to me? Huh??
I am getting my "failed" results soon. =(( 2008 worst day is coming. =(( Scare~
How to celebrate my precious December?? ...try again or walk away...

我才终于明白
办不到的承诺
就成了枷锁
现实中......
幸福永远缺货

Tell me the difference between 依赖 and 利用?
I'll do anything for you. What should I do?
I'll wait. Trust that things will be different soon.
I just dont want to blog lar. Makes me emo.
What the hell??!!! Forgive me.
This is not happening everyday.
December is COMING!!!!!!!
CELEBRATE DECEMBER~~ =DD

明明很爱你又不快乐
...try again or walk away...

Tell me if time should make a change
Then why do I feel the same

I want to change HP. Can I?
...try again or walk away...

Its only 5 days a week and only 6 hours per day. My only motivation is only money. Haha. It seems like I am working hard trying to hold 2 jobs or maybe 3. But, its just exchanging a few hours for a few coins. Haha. Dont worry about me. Its just the first week. Frugal living is my new way of life. I am not going to spend $$ on "CAB" anymore. Money is my current topic.

I am not walking here and there bugging her to buy me a psp this year. I have no idea what I want cos its my sis 21st and priority shouldnt be on me. But when my mama splurges on me, I just wish that I never wasted my time. The other daughter will be so jealous if she finds out. I am going to pretend that I am not being loved when I am.

没想过有些难过
我自己不说却被看透

"its like that lah. oxygen lo.
you never know its there.
so, when its gone?
cant use nitrogen ba."

回忆越是甜 就是 越伤人了
我站在你左侧 却像隔著银河
为什麼失去了 还要被惩罚呢?

你值得真正的快乐!!
...try again or walk away...

Time and time again. It is always about that.
My life becomes SO meaningless when I have too much time being ALONE.
Today reminds me of that every second. WHY?
Cos my exams are over. Nothing I could or should do.

I hate being home alone. I just depend on those phone calls.
Saying good morning and goodnight to be smiling.
I dont like to blog too much now. These are the only things I can think of now.

Being content seems so hard to me.
Stop wishing that things are different!!
THE PAST IS OVER!!!!

Stop me from blogging. Hahaha. This is the reason. =))



Tomorrow will be a brand new day!!
I just need some SUN to kill the germs.

...try again or walk away...

Not a happy thing that my exams ended. I am failing my papers. Trial exam is of no use. If onli I knew that nothing is the same. Unlucky. Wa KAO!!! I had to force myself to sit for a paper that I knew I am going to fail badly. 2 hours of writing blanks. I gave up. Prepare to repeat a whole semester with the greatest management subject. Hais. I cant turn back time now. Nothing good is happening to me. =((

At least for that one day, I feel loved. =))
Cry 10 days to smile for once. I wont mind.

Sorry about the photos. I am lazy.
Send you online if you want.
Nudge me. =))

Blog is dead. I am trying to keep secret about my life.
Hahaha.
...try again or walk away...

Something is wrong with the uploading.
Please hold while I erm.. upload again. =))

Repeat semester. Standby. Arr. Sad~~
I need a hug. =(( Still waiting for you...
Uploading photos.

17/10/2008
HAppy BirthdAy~
...try again or walk away...

=))
...try again or walk away...

每个人的心底里，也许都都沉淀着一段过往。快乐的往事，如糖，化在了水里，我们喝了下去，于是，眼底，眉梢，从此都留下甜蜜的痕迹。而那些不快乐的事，像糖里的杂质，沉在了杯底，不去碰它，它自在那里，可是，只要轻轻地一搅动，再清澈的心情，也会变得，浑浊。若喝下去，它会摩擦我们柔软的心，若有似无地痛，会更加地，痛彻心扉。因此，我们只能静静地，等待。等待它，再次沉淀。 ...try again or walk away...

Can you take the exams for me??
I AM DYING.
Nothing goes into the brain. Only words of "die!, die!, DIE LIAO!!!"
*CRIES* ...try again or walk away...

When something "bad" happens, something good happens too.
At least you know who will be with you to the end.
Feeling appreciated by a whisper of "thanks"

Even though we dont see each other often, sometimes I do think of you.
Cos I know you are the one who will always be there for me.
I dont know whether you would share my joy if I am happy.
But I am more than grateful to have you in my life.
Thanks.

I feel old and lonely again.
...try again or walk away...

Back and gone. Hais~
But its ok!!
Hahahahaha~~
Home Alone 4
...try again or walk away...

You came to mend a broken heart
You gave my life a brand new start
and now
I'm in love

But
Feeling so helpless, useless, worthless when he fakes a smile for me. I cant sleep but I am feeling sleepy every minute. I cant think. At that presentation which is my worst. I dont know what I am talking at ALL. Everything is so wrong. I cant do anything right. I really hope that just being there helps a bit.
FUCKING HELL~!!!!!
Frustration never ends.

Keep me busy?
...try again or walk away...

I just read 君空. Story = sky of love. I am supposed to read my notes and textbks. Haha. I miss this feeling. Home alone isnt that bad. I shouldnt complain that much. Maybe everyone need time on their own. Tomorrow having the last class before my exams. I am worrying too much again. What will happen will happen. I just want to see you everyday, you may not =(( Arr.. Haha. Tomorrow will be a better day!!
...try again or walk away...

I am trying very hard now. Studying for exams is just so difficult. I still have that last assignment to do. The bed. the computer, the TV and the HP are the distractions. Nothing gets in the brain except that "conspicuous consumption" for topic 2. Keep reminding myself that I am failing my econs. My misery. Argg.
2 more days. I am addicted to asking "where are you?" and "what are you doing". I am so irritated by myself. Such a kpo. =((
I need to relieve those unwanted stress. I am frowning and wrinkles are here. I see myself growing older. =((
...try again or walk away...

Dying!! ...try again or walk away...

Does it show again just how much I miss you
I'm weak, it's true
Cause I'm afraid to know the answer
I'm just scared to know the ending
I'm really missing you
I want to be where you are
I'll cherish all the love that we share ...try again or walk away...

4 more days. ...try again or walk away...

最近比较烦
我以为伤心可以很少
我以为我能过的很好
谁知道一想你
思念苦无药

I am back in Singapore. And he left me again.
I am not blogging often. Cos he doesnt know that this blog exists.
Whenever I wanted to blog........ how to say??
I am talking to you without letting him know.
Arr. Cant leave me alone here. =((
I lost my way when something good had just begun

我想念你

...try again or walk away...

Am I really that distracted?? =(( I am very very very upset now.
I only scored 12. I tot I only had one mistake. 7 marks lost at where??? Tell me!!!!!!
I HATE ECONS!!!!!! If everyone is saying the same thing, I guess I have to do something about it. Maybe is just an excuse. =((

...try again or walk away...

I don't ever wanna lose this feeling
I don't wanna spend a moment apart ~
=((

Monday.
Going to spend the whole day at home listening to 883 jia fm.

I am hungry. No one brings food for me. =((
你在就好了
...try again or walk away...

MY BOYFRIEND LEFT ME !!!!!!!
~SCREAMS!!!*~
=((
...try again or walk away...

MeiHui the photographer.

Had a great time at sentosa on Sunday. =))
I like the sun. I like the sand. I like the food. I like that bottle. I like the people.
Zilin drove us to sentosa and sent us home. Sacrifice her first time by saying sorry for us. Grateful~ THANK YOU!!
The habit of stopping at nowhere to chat continues. We actually sat down at a funny place after going to the washroom. A place when vistors stand around looking down at the night view of habour front. Talking about random stuffs and "reflecting" on the past. Missing about the days we spend in the "dog hole" we had.

I had a dream that night.
If it is real, tell me what should I do.
What does it mean?
We never and will never forget about you. <3

...try again or walk away...

Every morning, the few hours before the class starts. I am glued to the bed or the computer screen. Hate to go school~ =(( True motivation comes from where? EMO!!! Test. I am under stress when I am doing nothing. I am doing nothing everyday. =((

Did I make it that easy to walk right in and out of my life?

My back is turned on you
Should have known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do ...try again or walk away...

I was late for class today. I was sitting in the row nearest to the lecturer. I fall asleep. OMG~ I cant concentrate at all. My mind is 85% in the dreamland. Yawns. So I decided to go home and sleep when the class were having the break. I took my bag and off I go. I guess the lecturer might be having coffee on the right. So I took a left turn instead. OH SHIT!!! Why is he standing outside the toilet? And our eyes met in a awkward way. Wah SEY~~ Damn paiseh. I just make a 180 degrees turn and walk 100km/s to the stairs. The "paiseh-est" moment. AARRRR~
...try again or walk away...

...try again or walk away...

Finally!! It's time to move on. My last day at work is today!! Maybe I will go back one fine day when they desperately need people and I am kind as usual. I need a new job~ Should I learn cooking? Haha. A random thought. =)) I am a student. So, I do what a student should do. Why worry? I must save money on electricity. Laughs~ ...try again or walk away...

The Singapore Flyer~


17th August is our 5th month and is the day he bought the tickets.
I am spending my day at home playing mahjong.
And 3 girls are getting silver for my country.


Ready for 开心的事情?

Why does it rain? Romantic~


It keeps turning.


Where is my pretty girlfriend?

Sweethearts. <3<3

The reflection itself is so nice~~

I am looking at the way you looked at me.

Singapore is a beautiful place.


One more smile. =))

...try again or walk away...

Shall blog the happy things after those excess unwanted thinking disappears while I do my assignment later. My first Singapore Flyer Trip with no outsiders in the capsule. =))
...try again or walk away...

Everything was fine till he said something in the night. It was just one casual remark saying that he doesnt have to see me everyday. I thought time was what I always have but stingy to give. I try to prevent myself from making the same mistake but end up making another.
现在的我所给的时间，其实只是像在要求更多。


如果当时我有给你想要的时间，
陪我的人现在会不会是你？
...try again or walk away...

Guess if you are missing me too much. I have the need to inform you what I've been doing lately.
On Mondays is my boyfriend day. I will wake up to greet him good morning and spent the morning watching fated to love you and sleep till he calls me out. Spent the entire day out or having dinner with my family while watching superband. Today is the first time he cooked something for me to eat. =DD An amazing delicious instant noodles!! We went to hunt for bday present for Budimah and he went for that dinner. I spent my evening alone at home listening to songs and trying to type a few sentences for my assignment. Never fails to make me sleepy.

On Tuesdays, I find people I love to spend the day with me. Supposed to be my bf (best friend) day too. =)) Or I might stay at home sleeping, eating and rotting. If I am lucky, I will get to go work for some functions to earn a few dollars.

On Wednesday, I have lesson in the morning. I head home straight after class. Sometimes will search for food around my neighbourhood. Sit in front of the tv or in front of the computer screen. When I get too stoned, I will switched on 16 degrees celsius an hide under my blanket. Wait for my mama to come home or some kind people to ask me out for dinner. If my guy works morning shift, I will hope that he dont go to gym after work. I can just chat on the phone for the whole night. Flips the textbook and falls asleep instantly. Greatest sleeping pills.

On Thursday, I have lesson in the afternoon. Almost similar to my Wednesdays. I get to sleep later and much much later. I would skipped my breakfast and lunch. Goes to school to had the ban mian without the mian. After class and run back home for my beauty sleep. So no life right?

On Fridays, I am busy. I wake up early to pack my things for school and for work after school. Squeeze the time for breakfast cum lunch cum dinner. Sometimes I dont get to eat anything till I reach home. Cos of the stupid transport, I will reach home 5 to 6AM. When I work for the night, I become so tired that no amount of sleep I get from the other weekdays will be enough. I close my eyes for a few minutes. The sun is up. I dont like Fridays. I got used to this output, this is my income.

I had class on Saturdays too and luckily some Saturdays off are here. I will sleep longer. Wakes up to work or take my time from school to work. Makes a little differences if I have class or not. The dark circles is usually cause by the travelling done. After work, I will be very pleased. Because the week is ending. And my mondays are coming soon. =DD

Sundays is my MAHJONG day, if I request not to work. Spent the whole day mahjong-ing, laughing, getting insane and fat. Always eating after 2 big rounds of mahjong. Yup. The legendary training mahjong-ing session when the cheeks muscles are built up. End the night with the madness still vividly in the mind.

One week ends and another week begins.
...try again or walk away...

HAPPY~~


With flash.


Without flash


Cute scary people.


My favourite one and only mouldy algae. <3
Love love. =DD


I miss you, always. Love you as much as I love to smile.
=))
...try again or walk away...

When you tell me that you love me, I'm shining like a candle in the dark.
<3
...try again or walk away...

原来我还在意 ...try again or walk away...

I have lots of photos yet to be posted. I cant even spent a few minutes just to type a few words. Not so good. I can spend the whole day doing nothing and just keep sleeping and sleeping. Drag me to school. I cant afford the time to slack. I am so guilty after skipping my lesson yesterday. Hais. Drifting away~
...try again or walk away...

Who says I have a hard time making things last?? Who?? HAHAHAHAHAHA~~~
It is indeed a little difficult to stay committed. However, =DD
I am very very very HAPPY. =DD
ITS THE 4tH MONTH TODAY!!!!
May be nothing amazing to you. But, hohohoho~~
I AM IN LOVE!!!!! <3

I'm thinking of you 我有你真好
只要牵着你的手就知道
我早已经没有任何缺少
因为我拥有你在我心里

我会提醒自己把这份爱收好

...try again or walk away...

I am back home~ Ok. I got things to blog. DEN I forgot. DAMN IT. I dont care. See you when I am free. Most probably, next week. =DD ...try again or walk away...

I haven been taking care of my love. I lost it for a few days and I miss it SO much. I got it back now, I promise I will never let it get sick again. My lappy costs me $120!! How many meals can I have with that amount? I am going to eat bread and drink water till my next cheque comes. Sad. And this stupid anti-virus thing is driving me crazy. Just when one thing goes wrong. My unlucky day starts from Monday when I complained that my bf dont care about me. Which is entirely not true because I just need some attention. It should be the retribution I get for being unreasonable. I try not to sleep too much now. I am getting a little brain damage when I forget things I did in just a few minutes before. I ignore everything around me with no intention. This is a warning sign for me. I am scare of getting stupid. Few photos for you. I am still lazy by the way.

At budget terminal


Board the plane. Tiger Airways.


A beautiful sunrise.


Still as lovely. =))


Reach Bangkok Airport. Photographer: ZiLin


...try again or walk away...

Nothing amazing for my first day. But I met familiar faces that makes my day~ =DD Takes some time before I am ready for school. 5 minutes, I will be ready. Flip that textbook. ...try again or walk away...

I think I totally lost the feel to blog. Stare at the screen for almost an hour. Not knowing wad to type. Abandon ship~ Haha. But not to worry. I am as happy as can be. Just being more and more lazy. =DD

I am going to start school in like 15 hours later. Wow. Next chapter of school life. I hope that I wont skip lessons anymore. Prays hard~ I had NO "A" in my transcript, how sad is that? But I am alright. Cos I dont really bother about my results anyway. Like to complain and do nothing. HAHA. HOPEFULLY, this 2 years I could see some "A"hem and smile from left to right. LAUGHS. I haven upload the Bangkok photos yet. HAHAHAHAHA. I am still lazy. Rest well. TOMORROW meet some new and nice classmates without any new "spoilers".

HELLO SAMANTHA~~ WHERE ARE YOU?? HAHA.
HOW IS SCHOOL?? HAD FUN?? I MISS YOU~

Kill that lazy bug in me. I need to sleep less than half a day. I am getting slower.
Alright. BYE.
...try again or walk away...

Lazy and lazy plus VERY VERY VERY lazy. HAHAHAHA~~~ Soon. Very soon. I promise. =DD ...try again or walk away...

I dont have that dying feeling anymore. Better now. Haha. Photos from my camera or I collect from all before I post? Yar!! I AM BACK IN SINGAPORE on Tuesday night. I spent my whole day in bed yesterday. And my brain now keeps on play the boots with the fur song. Faints~ ...try again or walk away...

=DD Happy~ WEE~~ Must study hard and get a good job. Earn money and buy a car to spend days like that. Going everywhere to enjoy life. Hungry eat tired sleep. Sleep long hours. I WANT TO PLAY MAHJONG!!! I forgot viwawa exists. I shall play that tomorrow~ =DD Am I suppose to work? Troublesome. YAWNS~~ Got to go RHB bank tomorrow to settle my loan. And to DBS to activate my atm card. I have to go library to drop a book. Pack my bag see what else I need. I might be free in the night. Call me if you want to. =)) ...try again or walk away...

Singapore is not very big. Adventure~ =DD Happy sia~ SONG BO?!!! YEAH~~~ Lead the way!!! Meaningful, memorable and exciting night. Guess? HAHA. Preview of how fun it can be in BANGKOK. =DD 4 more days. WOOT!!! ...try again or walk away...

I met my lover for lunch before I go to work. We took a bus from TPY to turf city. I was staring into space at the turf city coffee shop waiting for transport and some tears choose to fall. I dont know what happened to my eyes. Maybe it was too thirsty and need some water. I am seriously thinking nothing. So, he saw me "crying". WTH!! Find me a reason~ OMG. I am NOT emo-ing.

I am skipping work on Sundays too. my FAT paycheck going diet this June. 5 more days to go. WEE~~ Happy like one kind. Celebrate FREE and EASY days~~ =DD ...try again or walk away...

I went to play SOCCER~ Woot!!! SMILE!!! =D But I need to go back office tomorrow to help. YAWNS!! I should sleep now. GOODNIGHT!!! ...try again or walk away...

Cos my life is getting more and more boring. The last time that I am seen laughing my heart out is so long. I am really craving for the real holidays. Blame everyone but myself for being lazy. Tomorrow is Monday again~ I need a date without those unnecessary bulbs. No time will definitely not be the reason again. Mind changes when age increases. The things we wont do before, we will now. So dont be surprise of how nice I can be, even though I grumble often. HAHA~

虽然很难，还是尽量坚持吧

...try again or walk away...

All of a sudden, I wish that I am not in love. -.-" OH NO~ Is this a sign of something. Laughs. I just hope it doesnt happen often. Shh... Dont worry for me. He doesnt come here. *Winks* So this is our secret in this not so private blog. Maybe is like a inborn thingy. The "hard time trying to make things last." I miss myself being single and available. Risk nothing.

Hate that silence. Emo... ...try again or walk away...

13th June, please come quick. I need a real holiday. Can I have more time to be awake? I think I am sleeping even I am working. Need a comfort for that weary heart. Laughs. I am sweet and yet bitter at times. What the hell? Why is there a need to worry about having no money?
Do you know? I miss you.

...try again or walk away...

Just came back from work. I am waiting for my hair to dry. Decided to chat with you for a while. Haha. I think you shouldnt like to see me blogging frequetly. That hidden meaning.

Lets talk about work today. As usual the supper club thingy is full of rubbish and nonsense people. Trying to flirt with cute staffs in the bar like me. These things happened everytime but only today I felt so much affected. Irritating~ I am facing the guest waiting for him to tell me what he wants to drink. THAT FUCKER stare at me and put his hand behind my head. I just dont like people to touch my head. I almost wanted to slap his face real hard.

Next minute after I walked away from that particular arsehole, 2 guys try to flirt with me. The way they flirt is so STUPID. Put one tissue on the mouth says some random shits. Whatever~ I never notice that they are flirting with me, till the bf appear from my back asking me what happened. Cold sweat. Because his gf is too cute. I said nothing and went off. Imagine I tell him they are disturbing me. Will he kick their ass? Much later I pass by this 2 person again. This time I am trapped. They said want to show me magic. -.-" Roll eyes~ Pretend smile smile wait for them to finish talking. Noticed Chris eye signal (linjie go go, i save you) after he made the drinks for them. So thats my hero for the night. He got their attention and the second they turned away to look at him, I run away for "smoke" break.

I haven eaten anything lar. Will die soon. AND now I am so TIRED. My hair haven dry. I need to crap longer. But I have no energy left. DONT CARE anymore. I will just go zzz. Goodnight. ...try again or walk away...

I gave up the office job. HAHAHAHA~~~ The cash doesnt make me stay too. Can you imagine how BORing it is to me? Tomorrow maybe going down to survive one day. I actually wanted to help my cousin with his company. BUT really!!! IT IS VERY BORING. I rather be very busy and let the time goes by super fast than slacking to see the clock goes tick tock. 3 days of "late for work, extra long break, on the dot go home." I fired myself lor. Cannot make it. End here. I am tired.

...try again or walk away...

I am very sure you miss my post. Haha. I was sick yesterday. Having a slight fever. Giving me an excuse to skip my work. $64 wasted. I slept 2 whole days away. Hypersomnia is happening. I am so bored everyday. I only have my Mondays to look forward to. But. When it arrives, a different kind of thing would appear. I dont like lightbulbs. Today is my not so beautiful Monday. Blue. I am alone here in Singapore missing someone. =( I need to survive 4 more days without him. I need to wake up early tomorrow. Hate to think of that. I cant work in an OFFICE. SAVE ME~~!!! ...try again or walk away...

I used to love Mondays~ I spent my whole day sleeping. I will be working a new job tomorrow. With a drastic pay change. A super downgrade. SIM letters are here. I am so not going to the graduation. Money sucker. 1st July, I will be back in school. Boring lifestyle. ...try again or walk away...

I so dont like to online at this funny funny hour. Wish me luck on my next paycheck!! I exchanging my good liver for $$. Haha. Something interesting, I wake up around 4 am last night and came online. The next minute after I was entertaining AhWeng online, I am FLIRTING with Mr Soo GuiLong!! Hahahaha. Get this funny name. The thought itself is funny. I cant believe I am still enjoying his rubbish after soooooo long. Haha. No damage done. I love my boyfriend.

I didnt enjoy my Monday very much. In the morning, I went for a short swim. Less than an hour because of the unwanted crowd in the pool. Monday is not a good day to swim. Went to find ZiLin at Orchard. She is working at Isetan Shaw in the "KIDS" department. Try your luck if you want to pop by. And I wanted to watch Dance of the Dragon. He didnt want to watch. =(( The boyfriend along with 6-7 lightbulbs made me so tired. I had a hard time trying to figure out what they are chatting. Yawns. I must watch more HongKong dramas and learn their language.

My Thursday is free this week. Anyone wants to accompany me watch movie? =DD

...try again or walk away...

Shrinking liver~ HAHAHA!!! Eating and sleeping disorder. Be good to me!! ...try again or walk away...

http://www.happyplanetindex.org/list.htm
...try again or walk away...

I love you like never before~~ =DD

...try again or walk away...